NB - The eagle-eyed amongst you might have noticed a change in the order last week when I reviewed Fantastic Four 2 - I've decided to move The Trial of the Incredible Hulk back above the two Conan films, Elektra and the 2004 version of the Punisher as, looking back through the reviews, I think it's a marginally better film than those four. Okay, glad we've got that sorted - here goes the rundown.
41. DAREDEVIL (2003)
A prime example of how to get pretty much everything wrong when you're committing a Marvel comic to film, especially when compared against the more recent and infinitely superior Marvel Netflix series. It's difficult to say what the worst thing about this film is - the ultra-shoddy editing job which leads to the film's conclusion being rushed through about twice as fast as it should be? The blatant disregard for the comic book source which sees Daredevil, who's supposed to be dead against killing people, throwing villains under trains and leaving his name in lighter fluid at the scene like he's Zorro or something? The terrible acting veering from Ben Affleck's wooden performance as Matt Murdock to Colin Farrell over-acting his head off as Bullseye? The seriously creepy (especially in the post-Weinstein era) seduction sequence between Affleck and Jennifer Garner's Elektra? Pick any one really but it's safe to say that Daredevil really is the pits as far as the Marvel films we've reviewed so far go.
40. SPIDERMAN STRIKES BACK (1978)
Atrocious even by '70s Marvel standards, "Spiderman Strikes Back" is cursed with a plot that makes no sense whatsoever (CND students building a nuclear bomb to prove nuclear power is bad? Erm, what?!), repetitiveness that borders on the ridiculous (Spidey basically spends the entire film fighting the main bad guy's two goons and never gets anywhere near the chief villain himself) and a conclusion which basically involves him disarming a bomb five minutes after said villain has left the scene. Only saved from the dreaded wooden spoon spot by how awful the much bigger budgeted "Daredevil" was.
39. GENERATION X (1996)
It's a miracle the X-Men film franchise ever got round to being made given how terrible this prequel (based in Professor Xavier's school) was. Cursed with paper-thin plotlines and the Marvel films' most ultra-irritating (and not in a good way) villain, Matt Frewer's Professor Tresh who comes across like some sort of Lidl Jim Carrey at his most skin-scratchingly irksome, it's easy to see why this was mauled by the critics at the time and was pretty much swept straight under the carpet. Avoid like the plague.
38. CAPTAIN AMERICA (1979)
The first of a brace of films starring Reb Brown as Steve Rogers Jr, Captain America's son who's taking his dad's legacy forward into the late '70s. Yeah, my thoughts exactly. Hardly anything seems to happen in this film at all with maybe five minutes' worth of plot stretched out to an hour and a half. It tells you everything that the climax of the film sees Cap in a helicopter chasing after a nuclear warhead carrying lorry (!) heading down the motorway at all of 50mph...
37. CAPTAIN AMERICA (1990)
Well at least unlike the '70s films, this one pretty much stayed true to the comics. Unfortunately that's about all it gets right as a combination of a leaden script, badly dated special FX and some terrible acting (not least from Matt Salinger in the title role who's so wooden as to make Reb Brown look like Ian McKellen by comparison) saw yet another Captain America film sink without trace. Marvel really owe Chris Evans a massive thank you for helping to resurrect what looked like an absolutely hopeless cinematic case before he came along as Cap...
36. HOWARD THE DUCK (1986)
Howard the Duck does have a bit of potential at the beginning but then promptly abandons all of the semi-interesting sub-plots after about half an hour in favour of becoming a snore-inducingly generic action film by numbers. The saddest irony? This was the first Marvel film to really have some serious money thrown at it but it sunk into exactly the same traps (thin script, lots of padding and poor acting) that sunk nearly all of the small-budget '70s efforts.
35. SPIDERMAN: THE DRAGON'S CHALLENGE (1979)
Initially, it looks as if the makers of the '70s Spiderman films had learned their lessons by the third episode as this film starts off pretty well with Spidey getting involved in preventing an assassination attempt on a disgraced Chinese diplomat and trying to find the one person who can help exonerate him. However, the whole thing crashes and burns horrifically when Spidey finds his guy and travels to Hong Kong with him only to spend the next half an hour sightseeing leaving the big climax of the film being rushed through in about three minutes. Next!
34. THE RETURN OF THE INCREDIBLE HULK (1978)
The second of the '70s Hulk film trilogy was originally a second pilot for the TV series but unfortunately without an origin story, it just kind of feels like a regular episode stretched out to twice the length it should be. David Banner is in California looking for a cure for his Hulk curse when he gets diverted by an attempted poisoning plot among a wealthy family. Bixby aside, the acting here is well south of terrible and apart from an inadvertently hilarious scene involving the Hulk fighting a bear (!), "Return..." is just too damn dull to be worth checking out, clocking in (just to say) as the worst of the six Bixby/Ferrigno Hulk films.
33. MAN-THING (2005)
The last of the low budget Marvel films unfortunately only really confirms why the whole format bit the dust. Poorly written with a plot that drags and no real standout performances, Lionsgate were clearly aiming for the "Blair Witch Project" market with this swamp-based horror film and it does have some nice visuals and cinematography (its one saving grace) but it's so difficult to care about any other aspect of it that it well and truly sinks without trace.
32. THE DEATH OF THE INCREDIBLE HULK (1990)
After their late '80s rebirth, the Hulk films had just about stayed on the right side of enjoyable until this, the third and final one, which saw David Banner working with some scientists to try and find a cure for his condition only for a group of Russian agents (led by a female assassin who may or may not be Black Widow) to try and nick the research. This would've made a decent episode of the Hulk TV series but the plot just isn't developed enough to cover an hour and a half feature film.
31. BRIDE OF THE INCREDIBLE HULK (1978)
The third and final instalment of the '70s Hulk films at least attempts to play outside the box a bit with a plot involving David Banner becoming involved with a female research scientist in Hawaii suffering from a degenerative cellular disease in an attempt to cure both of their conditions. Some weird dream sequences unfortunately don't compensate for this suffering from the traditional '70s Marvel problem of a slow-paced plot and the film taking 90 minutes to go through maybe 45 minutes' worth of storyline. A brave attempt but ultimately it's sunk by the problems that plagued a lot of the other films from this era.
30. GHOST RIDER (2007)
Directed by the same team that screwed up Daredevil so badly, Ghost Rider unfortunately shares a lot of that film's shortcomings - a clunky script, lead actors who look wooden and disinterested (Nicolas Cage and Eva Mendes), disappointing fight sequences and a general feeling of awkwardness about the whole operation. The one thing that elevates it ever so slightly above that disaster is that at least it has some cool visuals and special FX (especially the Ghost Rider himself who looks suitably awesome) but it's hardly worth sitting through the rest of this goofy klutzfest to see them to be honest.
29. SPIDERMAN (1977)
The first cinematic Marvel film suffers from a lot of the same shortcomings as its '70s stablemates (principally a lack of action and some very badly done fight sequences) but it at least passes the time. Nicholas Hammond is watchable enough as Spidey but the decision to eschew the likes of Green Goblin and Dr Octopus to have a group of evil hypnotherapists as the baddies is downright baffling here.
28. CAPTAIN AMERICA 2: DEATH TOO SOON (1979)
The presence of Christopher Lee as the main villain here (even if he spends most of the film stuck in a prison warder's office) at least makes the second Reb Brown-era Cap film borderline watchable and there's some fight/action sequences that are unintentionally hilarious through how bad they are. Death Too Soon is anything but a classic but at least it's amusingly bad rather than flat-out boring like a lot of the films below it on this list.
27. RED SONJA (1984)
Some half-decent action sequences unfortunately can't save the third film in the Conan series - in terms of quality it's arguably not massively worse than its two predecessors but some decidedly sinister homophobic and anti-feminist themes in the plot definitely make this a bit uncomfortable to watch in places. Arnie has gone on record as saying it's the worst film he's ever been in which makes me think he's undergone psychotherapy to try and forget that "Batman And Robin" ever happened...
26. HULK (2003)
How on earth is it possible to take a film about a man who has the ability to turn into a ten foot tall green monster capable of destructive rages and make it boring of all things? I dunno but somehow Ang Lee managed it. Way too long with an overly convoluted plot and some migraine-inducing split screen visuals, Hulk is a promising idea that unfortunately wasn't executed very well at all. The fact that it's inferior to not just the Edward Norton reboot a few years later but also to two of the '80s Bill Bixby efforts which were made for a fraction of the cost should tell you everything.
25. THE FANTASTIC FOUR (1994)
The first "Fantastic Four" film looks like it was put together on a budget of about twenty quid (hence the reason it never even made it as far as the cinema but has surfaced online and via bootleg in the years since) but at least it's entertaining, albeit possibly not in the way the producers intended. With shoddy special FX and some hilariously bad acting, this should at least appeal to those who enjoy gratuitously naff B-movies if no-one else.
24. NICK FURY: AGENT OF SHIELD (1998)
More Marvel B-movie babylon, this time starring none other than David Hasselhoff as Nick Fury. If you ignore Sandra Hess as the ultra-annoying main villain Viper, this is actually a good silly low-budget fun with some acting straight from the "Joey from Friends" school and a script cheesier than an explosion in a fondue factory. Don't go expecting anything similar to the big budget efforts in other words but at least this is entertainingly daft.
23. DR STRANGE (1978)
Similar to the second '70s Captain America film, the insertion of a half-decent villain in here (Morgan Le Fay) at least makes this early take on "Dr Strange" reasonably watchable (well, that and the titular doctor's fantastic white man afro - if this isn't reintroduced in the event of a sequel from the modern Cumberbatch effort, I'll be very disappointed). It does suffer from some very slow bits and the special FX are as low-rent as you'd expect from a 1978 TV movie but I've seen a lot worse in this blog.
22. THE PUNISHER (1989)
Not as good as the Thomas Jane effort or the recent TV series but better than the dismal "War Zone", the original Punisher film starring Dolph "Ivan Drago" Lundgren as Frank Castle (!) seems tame compared to some of the more graphic Marvel Netflix series today despite the high body count. However, if a slice of simple no-brainer late '80s shoot-'em-up action is what you're after then I guess there's worse out there.
21. DOCTOR MORDRID (1992)
Originally a "Doctor Strange" reboot, Full Moon Pictures' license on the comic ran out while the film was in pre-production meaning the title was quickly changed to avoid them being sued. This is a reasonably diverting 75 minutes of B-movie action which is at least inoffensive enough and is almost worth seeing just for the badly animated fight between dinosaur skeletons at the film's climax.
20. THE FANTASTIC FOUR (2005)
Crucified by the critics at the time, this is another mid-noughties Marvel film that probably isn't quite as bad as you remember. Some decent special FX and snappy dialogue are unfortunately offset by a stop-start plot, an anticlimactic final fight scene and a cast that's split between putting in a decent shift (Chris Evans as the Human Torch, Michael Chiklis as the Thing and Ioan Gruffadd as Mr Fantastic) and looking downright miscast (Jessica Alba as the Invisible Woman and Julian McMahon who just looks hopelessly lost with the terrible script he's been given as Dr Doom). Ultimately while it shows a bit of promise here and there, this version of the Fantastic Four has to go down as a frustrating near-miss.
19. THE INCREDIBLE HULK (1977)
Arguably the first of the modern day Marvel films, this trailer for the long-running '70s Hulk TV series sets the stall out well with a well-explained back story and some good performances. Granted, as with a the other '70s Marvel films the special effects leave a bit to be desired and it looks dated in places but overall this passes an hour and a half nicely enough.
18. MEN IN BLACK 2 (2002)
While the first MIB film was smart, slick and entertaining, there was a definite whiff of the scriptwriters phoning it in for the follow-up with a lot of material that just felt as if it had basically been recycled wholesale from the first film. MIB2 still has its charm (and the scene with the mini-aliens in the locker is almost worth watching this one for on its own) but it definitely felt as if it was running on fumes a bit in terms of content.
17. BLADE TRINITY (2004)
Riven with production problems and critically panned on its release, mainly because it was more of a straight-up action film than the blood 'n' guts splatterfest of the first two Blade films, the strange truth is that "Blade Trinity" is probably actually a bit better than you remember it. It's still the weakest of the Blade trilogy with a hopelessly miscast main bad guy ("Prison Break"'s Dominic Purcell completely failing to be threatening as Dracula/Drake) but it actually probably trumps the first two in terms of decent fight sequences and has Ryan Reynolds starting to lay down the wise cracking anti-hero schtick he'd eventually perfect in "Deadpool" plus Triple H from WWE as one of the baddies so there's plenty of positives to take heart from. With Wesley Snipes and director David Goyer falling out big time during filming though, the end was nigh for the franchise.
16. X-MEN: LAST STAND (2006)
Another example of "third film curse", X-Men: Last Stand lacks a lot of the subtleties of its two predecessors making it feel a bit like an action film by numbers in places while the plotlines are all over the place making it difficult to focus on what's going on half the time. It's not completely without merit and the cast put an honest shift in (even if the sheer number of new characters mean that some of them are woefully underdeveloped) but overall this just feels a lot less special than the first two X-Men films did.
15. CONAN THE DESTROYER (1984)
Similar to the first Conan film, this isn't a movie you'd watch for the acting but it's got enough swords, sorcery, swashbuckling and general silliness to just about carry it through. Arnie is back with a new set of compadres (including Grace Jones of all people) who are enlisted to help a princess recover a sacred gem from some evil monsters. Undoubtedly a bit silly but it passes a rainy afternoon nicely.
14. ELEKTRA (2005)
Critically reviled to this day, the truth is that Elektra surprisingly isn't actually anywhere near as terrible as a lot of people say. Okay so it's basically a 90 minute non-stop ninja fight sequence with the plot kept to a bare minimum but at least those sequences are handled well and generally look pretty impressive (with the exception of the one that looks like it's being held on a haunted house level of Super Mario but anyway...) with a fun array of villains. And c'mon, it's got Terrence Stamp in it plus Jennifer Garner in red PVC, it can't be that bad...
13. CONAN THE BARBARIAN (1982)
Yes, the acting in this is terrible and there's a couple of occasions where it goes completely indecipherable but there's a reason "Conan" kickstarted Arnie's career and spawned so many copycat films during the '80s, namely that it's got bloodshed, sex and gore by the bucketful. Quite simply, if it's ultraviolent no-brainer swords and sorcery nonsense you're after then this should do quite nicely.
12. THE PUNISHER (2004)
Probably the best of the three Punisher films to date in that at least unlike the other two it's not either horribly dated or an over-violent one-dimensional snorefest. Despite some plotholes, a finale that pretty much defines the word "grim" and a hopelessly miscast John Travolta in the chief villain role, this does at least have some decent action sequences and attempts to inject a bit of dark humour into Frank Castle's story. Not brilliant but not a total disaster either.
11. THE TRIAL OF THE INCREDIBLE HULK (1989)
Surprisingly dark, especially given how light-hearted its predecessor was, "Trial" sees David Banner caught up in some underhand business involving the Kingpin (John Rhys Davies) leading Matt Murdoch/Daredevil (Rex Smith) to come to his rescue both in and outside of the courtroom. Apart from an ending which doesn't really resolve the film properly (mainly because it was supposed to be the precursor for a Daredevil TV series which was never commissioned), this is actually a surprisingly good film with a gripping plot and some good performances from Bixby, Smith and Davies. Not bad at all.
10. FANTASTIC FOUR - RISE OF THE SILVER SURFER (2007)
Another unfairly maligned mid-noughties Marvel film which I think copped most of its flack for being very much aimed at the kids' end of the Marvel market. However, if you can get over the fact that it lacks the depth of some other films around this time, this is actually an improvement on the first Fantastic Four film even if it does suffer from the same uneven acting problems (to wit - they still haven't worked out how to portray Dr Doom properly) and takes a few liberties with the comic books. With a much more developed plot and some cool aerial chase sequences involving the Silver Surfer though, this is a perfectly inoffensive hour and a half of fun which should suit any Marvel-loving parents looking to introduce their kids to the genre perfectly.
9. SPIDERMAN 3 (2007)
Spiderman 3's main problem is trying to follow its two predecessors which had pretty much set the high watermark for Marvel films prior to its release. In places, it's undeniably silly (the emo Peter Parker scenes) and convoluted (having three villains is definitely a case of overkill especially given that Venom and Sandman both essentially sit half the film out) but beneath the chaos there is the basis of a good story there to round off the trilogy with a decent mix of high octane action scenes and surprisingly touching moments. Yes, it's undeniably flawed but, like a few mid-noughties Marvel films, Spiderman 3 is actually a bit better than most people seem to remember especially compared to the ill-advised reboot that came afterwards.
8. THE INCREDIBLE HULK RETURNS (1988)
The first outing from Bill Bixby and Lou Ferrigno in six years, "The Incredible Hulk Returns" is an enjoyable slice of '80s TV movie fun as David Banner gets a new research buddy in California in the form of his former student Donald Blake who's been entrusted with a warhammer containing the spirit of the mead-swilling viking warrior Thor (Eric Kramer whose lovable oaf turn pretty much steals the film) creating all sorts of problems. The plot may be slightly on the thin side but a mix of solid acting performances and some fun action sequences (even if they're a bit constrained by the timeframe) make this an enjoyable hour and a half.
7. BLADE (1998)
Despite some shoddy editing and a few rather noticeable plotholes, Wesley Snipes' first outing as the half-vampire vampire slayer has actually held up surprisingly well in the 20 years since its release. With plenty of blood 'n' guts and a show-stealing turn from Stephen Dorff as Blade's viciously evil nemesis Deacon Frost, Blade may not exactly be the most complex film out there but at least it's two hours of gory unclean fun.
6. BLADE 2 (2002)
Although it shares many of the shortcomings of its predecessor (dated fight sequences and a few noticeable holes in the plot mainly), Blade 2 is probably the superior film as it has a bit of a meatier plot to get to grips with involving Blade working with an unlikely alliance of vampires, half of whom are blatantly just itching to turn on each other. You know there's going to be betrayal, treachery, blood and gore but you just don't know when and it's this that makes for a slightly flawed but enjoyable rollercoaster of a film.
5. X-MEN (2002)
Although Blade and Men In Black could both arguably dispute this, X-Men was pretty much the film that proved that Marvel films plus a big budget genuinely could work. With a slick script, a stellar cast (Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, Hugh Jackman, Halle Berry, Rebecca Romijn, Famke Janssen) and some cool action sequences that really looked like they were taking things to the next level, this was definitely a key moment in Marvel films' evolution.
4. MEN IN BLACK (1996)
Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones' first outing as the alien investigating task force was a pointer towards what was to come in terms of Marvel spin-off films. The teaming up of the wisecracking Smith with the deadpan Jones works well and Vincent D'Onofrio is suitably disgusting as their giant cockroach adversary. Definitely a watershed moment, "Men In Black" proved that spending big money on a comic book tie-in actually could work...
3. X-MEN 2 (2003)
This comes very close to being derailed by the sheer amount of new characters and storylines during its first half but to its credit, X-Men 2 manages to turn things around with an excellent climactic final battle which not only saves the film but actually elevates it above its predecessor. With all the cast putting in strong turns (even if some of them are a bit starved of script-time), a good storyline and Brian Cox doing a good job as the crazed villain Stryker, X-Men 2 remains the high point of the franchise out of the ones we've reviewed so far.
2. SPIDERMAN (2002)
Yes, there have been films with bigger budgets since it was released but the first "Spiderman" film of the modern era is still a joy to watch 15 years on with great performances from Tobey Maguire as Spidey and Willem Dafoe as his schizophrenic nemesis the Green Goblin with Kirsten Dunst as MJ and James Franco as Harry Osborn doing a sterling job in support. Taking in humour, action and some genuinely touching moments, this is definitely a film well worth making the effort to track down and it definitely runs a lot of the MCU films close in terms of quality. And it's got Bruce Campbell and Randy Savage in it - what more recommendation do you need?!
1. SPIDERMAN 2 (2004)
If you were going to pick one film from the pre-"Iron Man" era to go toe to toe with the big budget Marvel Cinematic Universe epics, it would be this one. Sam Raimi had already done a good job with the first Spiderman film but he managed to raise the bar even further here with a real emotional rollercoaster which sees Peter Parker repeatedly hit rock bottom only to fall just a little bit further each time only to face his demons and new nemesis Doc Octopus (Alfred Molina) down and get that victory you'll be cheering him on all the way for. Not just the best pre-MCU Marvel film but one of the best Marvel films full stop.
39. GENERATION X (1996)
38. CAPTAIN AMERICA (1979)
37. CAPTAIN AMERICA (1990)
36. HOWARD THE DUCK (1986)
35. SPIDERMAN: THE DRAGON'S CHALLENGE (1979)
34. THE RETURN OF THE INCREDIBLE HULK (1978)
The second of the '70s Hulk film trilogy was originally a second pilot for the TV series but unfortunately without an origin story, it just kind of feels like a regular episode stretched out to twice the length it should be. David Banner is in California looking for a cure for his Hulk curse when he gets diverted by an attempted poisoning plot among a wealthy family. Bixby aside, the acting here is well south of terrible and apart from an inadvertently hilarious scene involving the Hulk fighting a bear (!), "Return..." is just too damn dull to be worth checking out, clocking in (just to say) as the worst of the six Bixby/Ferrigno Hulk films.
33. MAN-THING (2005)
The last of the low budget Marvel films unfortunately only really confirms why the whole format bit the dust. Poorly written with a plot that drags and no real standout performances, Lionsgate were clearly aiming for the "Blair Witch Project" market with this swamp-based horror film and it does have some nice visuals and cinematography (its one saving grace) but it's so difficult to care about any other aspect of it that it well and truly sinks without trace.
32. THE DEATH OF THE INCREDIBLE HULK (1990)
After their late '80s rebirth, the Hulk films had just about stayed on the right side of enjoyable until this, the third and final one, which saw David Banner working with some scientists to try and find a cure for his condition only for a group of Russian agents (led by a female assassin who may or may not be Black Widow) to try and nick the research. This would've made a decent episode of the Hulk TV series but the plot just isn't developed enough to cover an hour and a half feature film.
31. BRIDE OF THE INCREDIBLE HULK (1978)
The third and final instalment of the '70s Hulk films at least attempts to play outside the box a bit with a plot involving David Banner becoming involved with a female research scientist in Hawaii suffering from a degenerative cellular disease in an attempt to cure both of their conditions. Some weird dream sequences unfortunately don't compensate for this suffering from the traditional '70s Marvel problem of a slow-paced plot and the film taking 90 minutes to go through maybe 45 minutes' worth of storyline. A brave attempt but ultimately it's sunk by the problems that plagued a lot of the other films from this era.
30. GHOST RIDER (2007)
Directed by the same team that screwed up Daredevil so badly, Ghost Rider unfortunately shares a lot of that film's shortcomings - a clunky script, lead actors who look wooden and disinterested (Nicolas Cage and Eva Mendes), disappointing fight sequences and a general feeling of awkwardness about the whole operation. The one thing that elevates it ever so slightly above that disaster is that at least it has some cool visuals and special FX (especially the Ghost Rider himself who looks suitably awesome) but it's hardly worth sitting through the rest of this goofy klutzfest to see them to be honest.
29. SPIDERMAN (1977)
28. CAPTAIN AMERICA 2: DEATH TOO SOON (1979)
27. RED SONJA (1984)
26. HULK (2003)
How on earth is it possible to take a film about a man who has the ability to turn into a ten foot tall green monster capable of destructive rages and make it boring of all things? I dunno but somehow Ang Lee managed it. Way too long with an overly convoluted plot and some migraine-inducing split screen visuals, Hulk is a promising idea that unfortunately wasn't executed very well at all. The fact that it's inferior to not just the Edward Norton reboot a few years later but also to two of the '80s Bill Bixby efforts which were made for a fraction of the cost should tell you everything.
25. THE FANTASTIC FOUR (1994)
24. NICK FURY: AGENT OF SHIELD (1998)
23. DR STRANGE (1978)
22. THE PUNISHER (1989)
Not as good as the Thomas Jane effort or the recent TV series but better than the dismal "War Zone", the original Punisher film starring Dolph "Ivan Drago" Lundgren as Frank Castle (!) seems tame compared to some of the more graphic Marvel Netflix series today despite the high body count. However, if a slice of simple no-brainer late '80s shoot-'em-up action is what you're after then I guess there's worse out there.
21. DOCTOR MORDRID (1992)
Originally a "Doctor Strange" reboot, Full Moon Pictures' license on the comic ran out while the film was in pre-production meaning the title was quickly changed to avoid them being sued. This is a reasonably diverting 75 minutes of B-movie action which is at least inoffensive enough and is almost worth seeing just for the badly animated fight between dinosaur skeletons at the film's climax.
20. THE FANTASTIC FOUR (2005)
Crucified by the critics at the time, this is another mid-noughties Marvel film that probably isn't quite as bad as you remember. Some decent special FX and snappy dialogue are unfortunately offset by a stop-start plot, an anticlimactic final fight scene and a cast that's split between putting in a decent shift (Chris Evans as the Human Torch, Michael Chiklis as the Thing and Ioan Gruffadd as Mr Fantastic) and looking downright miscast (Jessica Alba as the Invisible Woman and Julian McMahon who just looks hopelessly lost with the terrible script he's been given as Dr Doom). Ultimately while it shows a bit of promise here and there, this version of the Fantastic Four has to go down as a frustrating near-miss.
19. THE INCREDIBLE HULK (1977)
Arguably the first of the modern day Marvel films, this trailer for the long-running '70s Hulk TV series sets the stall out well with a well-explained back story and some good performances. Granted, as with a the other '70s Marvel films the special effects leave a bit to be desired and it looks dated in places but overall this passes an hour and a half nicely enough.
18. MEN IN BLACK 2 (2002)
While the first MIB film was smart, slick and entertaining, there was a definite whiff of the scriptwriters phoning it in for the follow-up with a lot of material that just felt as if it had basically been recycled wholesale from the first film. MIB2 still has its charm (and the scene with the mini-aliens in the locker is almost worth watching this one for on its own) but it definitely felt as if it was running on fumes a bit in terms of content.
17. BLADE TRINITY (2004)
Riven with production problems and critically panned on its release, mainly because it was more of a straight-up action film than the blood 'n' guts splatterfest of the first two Blade films, the strange truth is that "Blade Trinity" is probably actually a bit better than you remember it. It's still the weakest of the Blade trilogy with a hopelessly miscast main bad guy ("Prison Break"'s Dominic Purcell completely failing to be threatening as Dracula/Drake) but it actually probably trumps the first two in terms of decent fight sequences and has Ryan Reynolds starting to lay down the wise cracking anti-hero schtick he'd eventually perfect in "Deadpool" plus Triple H from WWE as one of the baddies so there's plenty of positives to take heart from. With Wesley Snipes and director David Goyer falling out big time during filming though, the end was nigh for the franchise.
16. X-MEN: LAST STAND (2006)
Another example of "third film curse", X-Men: Last Stand lacks a lot of the subtleties of its two predecessors making it feel a bit like an action film by numbers in places while the plotlines are all over the place making it difficult to focus on what's going on half the time. It's not completely without merit and the cast put an honest shift in (even if the sheer number of new characters mean that some of them are woefully underdeveloped) but overall this just feels a lot less special than the first two X-Men films did.
15. CONAN THE DESTROYER (1984)
Similar to the first Conan film, this isn't a movie you'd watch for the acting but it's got enough swords, sorcery, swashbuckling and general silliness to just about carry it through. Arnie is back with a new set of compadres (including Grace Jones of all people) who are enlisted to help a princess recover a sacred gem from some evil monsters. Undoubtedly a bit silly but it passes a rainy afternoon nicely.
14. ELEKTRA (2005)
Critically reviled to this day, the truth is that Elektra surprisingly isn't actually anywhere near as terrible as a lot of people say. Okay so it's basically a 90 minute non-stop ninja fight sequence with the plot kept to a bare minimum but at least those sequences are handled well and generally look pretty impressive (with the exception of the one that looks like it's being held on a haunted house level of Super Mario but anyway...) with a fun array of villains. And c'mon, it's got Terrence Stamp in it plus Jennifer Garner in red PVC, it can't be that bad...
13. CONAN THE BARBARIAN (1982)
Yes, the acting in this is terrible and there's a couple of occasions where it goes completely indecipherable but there's a reason "Conan" kickstarted Arnie's career and spawned so many copycat films during the '80s, namely that it's got bloodshed, sex and gore by the bucketful. Quite simply, if it's ultraviolent no-brainer swords and sorcery nonsense you're after then this should do quite nicely.
12. THE PUNISHER (2004)
Probably the best of the three Punisher films to date in that at least unlike the other two it's not either horribly dated or an over-violent one-dimensional snorefest. Despite some plotholes, a finale that pretty much defines the word "grim" and a hopelessly miscast John Travolta in the chief villain role, this does at least have some decent action sequences and attempts to inject a bit of dark humour into Frank Castle's story. Not brilliant but not a total disaster either.
11. THE TRIAL OF THE INCREDIBLE HULK (1989)
Surprisingly dark, especially given how light-hearted its predecessor was, "Trial" sees David Banner caught up in some underhand business involving the Kingpin (John Rhys Davies) leading Matt Murdoch/Daredevil (Rex Smith) to come to his rescue both in and outside of the courtroom. Apart from an ending which doesn't really resolve the film properly (mainly because it was supposed to be the precursor for a Daredevil TV series which was never commissioned), this is actually a surprisingly good film with a gripping plot and some good performances from Bixby, Smith and Davies. Not bad at all.
10. FANTASTIC FOUR - RISE OF THE SILVER SURFER (2007)
Another unfairly maligned mid-noughties Marvel film which I think copped most of its flack for being very much aimed at the kids' end of the Marvel market. However, if you can get over the fact that it lacks the depth of some other films around this time, this is actually an improvement on the first Fantastic Four film even if it does suffer from the same uneven acting problems (to wit - they still haven't worked out how to portray Dr Doom properly) and takes a few liberties with the comic books. With a much more developed plot and some cool aerial chase sequences involving the Silver Surfer though, this is a perfectly inoffensive hour and a half of fun which should suit any Marvel-loving parents looking to introduce their kids to the genre perfectly.
9. SPIDERMAN 3 (2007)
Spiderman 3's main problem is trying to follow its two predecessors which had pretty much set the high watermark for Marvel films prior to its release. In places, it's undeniably silly (the emo Peter Parker scenes) and convoluted (having three villains is definitely a case of overkill especially given that Venom and Sandman both essentially sit half the film out) but beneath the chaos there is the basis of a good story there to round off the trilogy with a decent mix of high octane action scenes and surprisingly touching moments. Yes, it's undeniably flawed but, like a few mid-noughties Marvel films, Spiderman 3 is actually a bit better than most people seem to remember especially compared to the ill-advised reboot that came afterwards.
8. THE INCREDIBLE HULK RETURNS (1988)
The first outing from Bill Bixby and Lou Ferrigno in six years, "The Incredible Hulk Returns" is an enjoyable slice of '80s TV movie fun as David Banner gets a new research buddy in California in the form of his former student Donald Blake who's been entrusted with a warhammer containing the spirit of the mead-swilling viking warrior Thor (Eric Kramer whose lovable oaf turn pretty much steals the film) creating all sorts of problems. The plot may be slightly on the thin side but a mix of solid acting performances and some fun action sequences (even if they're a bit constrained by the timeframe) make this an enjoyable hour and a half.
7. BLADE (1998)
Despite some shoddy editing and a few rather noticeable plotholes, Wesley Snipes' first outing as the half-vampire vampire slayer has actually held up surprisingly well in the 20 years since its release. With plenty of blood 'n' guts and a show-stealing turn from Stephen Dorff as Blade's viciously evil nemesis Deacon Frost, Blade may not exactly be the most complex film out there but at least it's two hours of gory unclean fun.
6. BLADE 2 (2002)
Although it shares many of the shortcomings of its predecessor (dated fight sequences and a few noticeable holes in the plot mainly), Blade 2 is probably the superior film as it has a bit of a meatier plot to get to grips with involving Blade working with an unlikely alliance of vampires, half of whom are blatantly just itching to turn on each other. You know there's going to be betrayal, treachery, blood and gore but you just don't know when and it's this that makes for a slightly flawed but enjoyable rollercoaster of a film.
5. X-MEN (2002)
Although Blade and Men In Black could both arguably dispute this, X-Men was pretty much the film that proved that Marvel films plus a big budget genuinely could work. With a slick script, a stellar cast (Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, Hugh Jackman, Halle Berry, Rebecca Romijn, Famke Janssen) and some cool action sequences that really looked like they were taking things to the next level, this was definitely a key moment in Marvel films' evolution.
4. MEN IN BLACK (1996)
Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones' first outing as the alien investigating task force was a pointer towards what was to come in terms of Marvel spin-off films. The teaming up of the wisecracking Smith with the deadpan Jones works well and Vincent D'Onofrio is suitably disgusting as their giant cockroach adversary. Definitely a watershed moment, "Men In Black" proved that spending big money on a comic book tie-in actually could work...
3. X-MEN 2 (2003)
This comes very close to being derailed by the sheer amount of new characters and storylines during its first half but to its credit, X-Men 2 manages to turn things around with an excellent climactic final battle which not only saves the film but actually elevates it above its predecessor. With all the cast putting in strong turns (even if some of them are a bit starved of script-time), a good storyline and Brian Cox doing a good job as the crazed villain Stryker, X-Men 2 remains the high point of the franchise out of the ones we've reviewed so far.
2. SPIDERMAN (2002)
Yes, there have been films with bigger budgets since it was released but the first "Spiderman" film of the modern era is still a joy to watch 15 years on with great performances from Tobey Maguire as Spidey and Willem Dafoe as his schizophrenic nemesis the Green Goblin with Kirsten Dunst as MJ and James Franco as Harry Osborn doing a sterling job in support. Taking in humour, action and some genuinely touching moments, this is definitely a film well worth making the effort to track down and it definitely runs a lot of the MCU films close in terms of quality. And it's got Bruce Campbell and Randy Savage in it - what more recommendation do you need?!
1. SPIDERMAN 2 (2004)
If you were going to pick one film from the pre-"Iron Man" era to go toe to toe with the big budget Marvel Cinematic Universe epics, it would be this one. Sam Raimi had already done a good job with the first Spiderman film but he managed to raise the bar even further here with a real emotional rollercoaster which sees Peter Parker repeatedly hit rock bottom only to fall just a little bit further each time only to face his demons and new nemesis Doc Octopus (Alfred Molina) down and get that victory you'll be cheering him on all the way for. Not just the best pre-MCU Marvel film but one of the best Marvel films full stop.
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